Life at 61

It's hard to believe that so much time has gone by since my last post.  I've not had a lot of time to write about myself.  I've had a good year working for myself as an independent contractor.  I've learned a lot in the last couple of months about flat spinning and nested spinning, which I am using in my writing career.  I'm embarking on a new chapter in my life where I will be doing speculative writing.  This is an art of writing what potential clients want to purchase.  There will be no more contract writing.  We will write what we know certain types of clients want, and then direct them to our site. It will be a sort of content store where our articles will sit parked in a gallery on display.  While they are sitting they will be earning passive income until a client comes along and asks to buy the content.

We will have to create the gallery in a way that our content cannot be stolen from us.  I'm not sure how that will be planned out, but we will work out all the bugs before the first article is put up on display.

My Thoughts about Turning 60 in 13 days

This is a milestone in my life. I am going to turn 60 years old soon. Gosh, that is a long time to be living on this planet. Why, it just seems like yesterday that I was a little kid bouncing on the floor, or trying to climb up into the kitchen chair that was way too big for me. I remember being able to walk under the kitchen table. And now I am fixing to turn 60.

I'm just wondering at what age I will start falling apart. Our bodies end up letting us down and we get sick and die... so I am wondering how much longer I have. Will I turn 70? Gosh in 20 more years I will be 80 years of age! I know age is just a number, but I am getting old fast. It seems like I am on a slippery slide into old age. No longer am I the young kid that enjoyed so much being young.

I've been going through some health issues; have been in the hospital twice within a month's time. There's apparently not much wrong with me, except that a couple of weeks ago I was totally disoriented to the date and year. I didn't know what month it was or anything. I wonder if I will have any more of these brain farts? That's what I am calling them now.. they are brain farts.

Since there is no evidence of a stroke or mini-stroke.. the doc thinks I might be having focal seizures.. We'll have to see about that. I am waiting for a call that will schedule me for an EEG to test my brain.

So far, my body is still in pretty good shape, but I know I will begin to fall apart. There's not much likelihood of me dying in a car accident, because I don't drive. I don't even ride much in the car with my daughter and her hubby.. so I might just live to be 80 or 90 years old.

I wonder if I will ever get to the point where I won't dread dying. Right now, I don't want to leave this life at all. I don't want to get old either.. but the alternative is to not be alive, and I do want to live. I wouldn't want to miss anything.

I wonder what it will be like to not be present in the body anymore. When I die I will leave my body and it will never speak, smile, or do anything ever again. It will be turned to ashes. What will it be like to pass through the veil into the heavenly realm? No one has ever gone and come back to tell us about it. I mean, there is no credible source. Maybe we die and that is it? Or maybe our souls go around again and again, and when we reach perfection we go to heaven? Or maybe we can have a choice to go to heaven or to come back. I really am curious as to what happens.

My mom and dad are dead. They are gone. I miss them. I wonder if they live in the place we call heaven. I wonder if their consciousness lives at all? I know what we are taught in church and the bible.. but I wonder if things are different than what has been taught to us. After all, all we know is what someone else has told us.